The quote is all about how to make your point clear to others, and for that, you have to understand their point of view first. When people are in conversation with others, most of them do not listen with the intent to understand, they listen with the intent to reply, they are preparing themselves to speak. They are reading their own autobiography into other people’s lives.
Communication is the most important skill in life. We spend years of learning how to read, write, and speak. But what about listening? We don’t have any training that enables us to listen, deeply understand another human being.
Empathic listening is powerful because it gives you the exact data to work on. Instead of projecting your own autobiography, assuming thoughts, feelings, motives and interpretations you are dealing with the reality inside another person’s head. You are listening to understand.